Integrity isn’t just about doing the right thing when people are watching—it’s about who you are when no one’s around. Leaders with integrity build trust, credibility, and strong teams. Without it, everything else crumbles. Proverbs 10:9 says, “Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out” (NIV). Integrity provides security—it ensures that our leadership isn’t built on a shaky foundation.

Caught Not Taught
When my family first moved to Tumwater, WA, as I started my new job as Youth Pastor of a local church, we attended a family carnival event in the Children's area. We hadn’t had breakfast before church and had planned to go to lunch afterward, so we were all running on empty. They offered simple lunches—hotdog, chips, and soda—but the church wasn’t set up to take card payments, and I didn’t have any cash on me.

I asked the volunteer taking money if I could pay later, and she said, “Being as you’re the new Youth Pastor, we can probably trust you.” Before I could respond, my 11-year-old daughter spoke up sternly: “If my dad says he's going to pay you later, he'll pay you later. My dad doesn’t lie!” Her words hit me hard because they reminded me of something important—integrity isn’t something we teach with words alone; it’s something we model through our actions. I had never sat my daughter down and told her I was a man of integrity, but she had seen it in my daily life. She knew it to be true because she had witnessed it firsthand.

Walking the Walk
Throughout my life, I’ve seen leaders who demand high standards from others but fail to meet those standards themselves. That’s not real leadership. I’ve learned that integrity means holding myself accountable to the same principles I expect from others. That’s why I intentionally surround myself with accountability partners, including those who are joining me in reading through the Bible in a Year. It’s easy to tell others to be in the Word daily—it’s another thing to live it out and let Scripture shape my leadership.

Integrity isn’t just about big moments—it’s about small, everyday decisions. It’s about showing up when you say you will, following through on promises, and choosing honesty even when it’s inconvenient. If we cut corners in the little things, we’ll eventually compromise in the big things.

The Call to Live with Integrity
James 1:22 reminds us, “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says” (NIV). Leadership with integrity isn’t just about knowing what’s right—it’s about living it. If we expect others to trust us, we must first prove that we are trustworthy.

So ask yourself:

• Am I the same person in private that I am in public?
  
• Do my actions reflect the values I claim to hold?
  

The answer to these questions will determine the kind of leader you are becoming.

Leading Yourself First
Leadership isn’t about barking orders from the sidelines. It starts with self-discipline, setting the example, and proving to yourself and others that you can do the work before expecting it from them. One of the quickest ways to lose credibility as a leader is to adopt a “Do as I say, not as I do” mentality. True leadership begins with leading yourself well—physically, mentally, and ethically.

As part of my own self-leadership journey, some accountability partners and I have begun reading through the Bible in a Year. I’ve often encouraged others to be in the Word daily, and this commitment helps me practice the same spiritual discipline while adding a layer of accountability.

Setting the Standard
I’ve been a martial artist my whole life, and one of the core principles of our Kenpo system is that we never ask a lower belt to do something we aren’t willing to do ourselves. That requires personal discipline and a commitment to self-leadership. When a white or yellow belt struggled with conditioning, I’d drop and do 100 push-ups right alongside them. Not only did it prove I wouldn’t ask them to do anything I couldn’t do, but it also helped them realize they were capable of more than they believed. When they saw me doing it, they found the strength to push through.

A similar thing happened when I was coaching 8th grade football. During conditioning, I called out the team for sandbagging—holding back instead of pushing themselves. One player, feeling bold, shot back, “I don’t see you running, Coach!” Instead of just reinforcing authority, I led by example. I told the team that he and I would race. If he won, conditioning was over for the day. If I won, they were running wind sprints. Let’s just say those wind sprints happened—and I believe they made us better as a team. That year, we took first place, not just because of talent, but because of discipline and a leadership mindset that started with me.

The Biblical Model of Self-Leadership
People follow leaders who are willing to put in the work alongside them. Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 11:1, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ” (NIV). That’s the model—leading by doing. Jesus didn’t just tell His disciples what to do; He lived it out in front of them. He withdrew for prayer, fasted, and showed discipline in every aspect of His life. If we want to lead others well, we have to lead ourselves first.

My commitment to daily Bible reading is another example of this. If I encourage others to be in the Word, I need to be doing it myself. Engaging with Scripture consistently strengthens my leadership and ensures that my guidance is rooted in truth.

Challenge: Master Yourself Before Leading Others
As leaders, whether in ministry, business, or life, self-leadership is the foundation for everything else. Our people shouldn’t just hear what we expect; they should see it in how we live. When you hold yourself to the same standards you expect from others, your leadership becomes authentic and powerful. So the next time you set expectations, ask yourself—am I leading myself first in the same way I expect others to follow?